Authentic Achievements with Special Guest Susan Fry
Embracing Self-Love and Authenticity: Insights from Susan Fry on “Authentic Achievements”
In a recent “Authentic Achievements” episode, the host, Kim-Adele Randall, converses profoundly with Susan Fry, a seasoned executive coach and transformation expert. Their discussion delves into the intricacies of personal and professional development, emphasising the critical role of self-love and the journey of self-discovery. Here, we break down the key themes and insights from the episode, offering actionable advice and thorough explanations to guide listeners on their path to authentic success.
Introduction to Susan Fry
Susan Fry brings nearly three decades of experience in coaching, focusing on the holistic integration of physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual dimensions. Her approach combines health, wellness, and business acumen, emphasising that true success stems from self-love and understanding one’s core beliefs.
The Nature of Love and Control
Key Insight:
Susan reflects on the misconception that love can be controlled or earned. She shares a pivotal moment when someone told her, “You cannot control love.” This realisation made her understand that true, unconditional love cannot be manipulated or earned through perfection or achievements.
Actionable Advice:
Surrender to Love: Embrace the idea that love is unconditional and cannot be controlled. Let go of the need to earn love through achievements.
Practice Vulnerability: Allow yourself to be vulnerable in relationships, which can foster deeper connections and a more authentic experience of love.
The Quest for Validation
Key Insight:
Susan recounts her childhood experiences of seeking validation through external achievements, believing that excelling in sports or other areas would earn her love and approval. This pattern of seeking validation is typical and can lead to a cycle of overachievement without genuine fulfilment.
Actionable Advice:
Reflect on Motivations: Identify areas where you seek validation through achievements. Reflect on whether these pursuits align with your true desires.
Cultivate Self-Worth: Focus on building self-worth from within rather than relying on external validation. Engage in self-affirmation practices and recognise your inherent value.
The Impact of Control on Relationships
Key Insight:
Susan warns that any relationship or endeavour built on control—whether in business or personal life—will eventually falter. Many women, in particular, may enter relationships or careers with a mindset of control, leading to dissatisfaction and disconnection.
Actionable Advice:
Let Go of Control: Embrace the unpredictability of life and relationships. Practice mindfulness and acceptance to reduce the need for control. Foster Authentic Connections: Build relationships based on mutual respect and understanding rather than control. Communicate openly and honestly with others.
The Challenge of Receiving Love
Key Insight:
Much of the discussion revolves around many people’s difficulty in receiving love. Susan shares her struggles with being a giver rather than a receiver, noting that this dynamic can affect relationships.
Actionable Advice:
Practice Receiving: Allow yourself to receive love and support from others. Acknowledge and appreciate the love that comes your way. Balance Giving and Receiving: Strive for a balance between giving and receiving in your relationships. Recognise that both are essential for healthy connections.
The Power of Presence and Intentionality
Key Insight:
Susan and the host discuss the importance of being present and intentional in personal and professional contexts. Susan shares her insights on leadership, emphasising that comfort with the uncomfortable is essential.
Actionable Advice:
Be Present: Practice mindfulness to stay present in the moment. Avoid distractions and focus on the task or person at hand.
Set Intentions: Clearly define your intentions for your actions and interactions. This can help you stay aligned with your values and goals.
Self-Discovery and Authenticity
Key Insight:
Susan encourages listeners to embark on a journey of self-discovery, urging them to confront and challenge their subconscious beliefs. Many individuals may feel unfulfilled despite their achievements because they are not aligned with their true selves.
Actionable Advice:
Explore Your Identity: Take time to explore your identity on physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual levels. Reflect on your true desires and passions.
Challenge Subconscious Beliefs: Identify and challenge any subconscious beliefs holding you back. If needed, seek support from a coach or therapist.
The Role of Parenting in Self-Love
Key Insight:
The discussion touches on how parenting influences self-love and self-perception. Susan reflects on her experiences and the generational beliefs that can shape a child’s understanding of love and worthiness.
Actionable Advice:
Model self-love and acceptance in your actions and attitudes: Children learn about self-worth from their parent’s behaviour.
Encourage Individuality: Support your child’s unique qualities and encourage them to embrace their individuality.
Embracing Imperfections
Key Insight:
Susan emphasises that self-love involves accepting oneself, flaws and all. She shares her struggles with self-acceptance and the realisation that true joy comes from recognising and embracing one’s authentic self.
Actionable Advice:
Accept Flaws: Acknowledge and accept your imperfections. Understand that they are part of what makes you unique.
Celebrate Authenticity: Celebrate your authentic self and the qualities that make you who you are: practice self-compassion and kindness.
The Journey Back to Self
Key Insight:
The episode concludes with reflecting on the journey back to one’s true self. Both speakers agree that this journey is essential for personal fulfilment and success.
Actionable Advice:
Break Free from Expectations: Let go of societal expectations and embrace your individuality. Focus on what truly matters to you.
Embrace Personal Growth: View every experience as an opportunity for personal growth. Learn from both lessons and blessings.
Final Thoughts
In closing, Susan reiterates that the answers to personal challenges lie within each individual. The conversation serves as a reminder that self-discovery, self-love, and the power of choice are fundamental to achieving authentic success and fulfilment. The episode leaves listeners with a sense of empowerment and encouragement to embark on their journeys of self-exploration and acceptance.
Connecting with Susan Fry
Susan invites listeners to connect with her through her LinkedIn profile or by taking her Authentic Blueprint Assessment. She desires to engage with others and help them through self-discovery and personal growth.
Connect with Susan Fry at simplyloveprocess.com
This episode of “Authentic Achievements” offers valuable insights into the nature of love, the importance of self-acceptance, and the journey toward authenticity. Susan Fry’s wisdom and experiences guide listeners seeking to navigate their paths to fulfilment and success. Embrace these insights and take actionable steps towards a more authentic and fulfilling life.
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Transcript:
0:00[Music]
0:05[Applause] hello and welcome to this episode of authentic achievements where it’s my
0:11absolute Delight to be joined by The Fabulous Susan fry Susan welcome thank
0:16you I’m glad to be here oh I’m so looking forward to this conversation I know we always get really stuck in and
0:22you’ve got such great Insight but before I get carried away let me share with the audience listening and watching a little
0:28bit more about you so Susan fry is a seasoned executive coach and transformation expert with nearly three
0:34decades of experience in helping individuals optimize their personal and professional lives she Blends Health
0:41wellness and business acument to enhance performance and productivity boosting cash flow in business Central to her
0:47approach is the understanding that true success arises from self-love and holistic integration of physical
0:53emotional mental and spiritual Dimensions through her simply love process Susan addresses Cor beliefs
1:00holding clients back guiding them to unlock their full potential she’s also a mother of four and an avid pickle ball
1:07player Susan is a beacon of inspiration and empowerment I mean what an amazing
1:12journey you’ve you’ve already had but could you share with us a little bit about the journey you’ve been on so far
1:19well I have been you know I painted years ago when I had my four children at
1:25home you know love what I do and do what I love and I follow that motto and so
1:33sometimes it’s a well not sometimes most of the time it’s outside of the box and
1:38thinking but it’s when I discovered having the joy that comes
1:46from being who you are that you know I started sharing it I
1:52love that it’s so true isn’t it we’ve got the one commodity that we’ve all got that is priceless is time it’s the only
2:00thing we can’t buy more of and so spending it doing things we love instead of spending it doing things that we hate
2:07um sounds super simple but it’s not that easy is it no it’s not always easy um it
2:15just becoming more aware and I think as you become more aware and present you can do it um I I
2:24think it is very easy it’s I mean it’s very simple but it’s not always easy and
2:29I ourselves that get get in the way so and it’s a part of my whole simply love
2:36process is that when you truly genuinely reach down and love yourself
2:44you’re going to do those things that are good for you but the problem is a lot of
2:49it’s the subconscious people don’t think about loving themselves because their
2:55subconscious mind is canceling it yeah that makes sense any sense it does it
3:01makes it makes total sense because I think you reading somewhere that we you know we create our sort of blueprint
3:07when we’re seven and we um we enforce it at 14 and we embed it at 21 and unless
3:13we go back and look at whether or not it still serves us we’re basically running on outdated software that is very often
3:20getting in our own way and you I certainly had to go on a journey to update my software in the last 10 years
3:26when I realized actually I was I was the problem I was the thing holding me back
3:32because I was busy giving giving giving to everybody else but I wasn’t ever doing any self-care or any self-love and
3:39um and that felt selfish um to do so every time I tried to do something for myself no no being selfish go to do
3:45something for else instead um and it it was a big journey of Discovery to go and
3:51find out how to actually like myself because you know I’ve not worked out yet how to get away from me you know
3:57wherever I go I go so is that that you know that needed to become a friendship
4:02and not a friendenemy um so how do you help people get started on that Journey
4:08well first of all you got to find out what you want you know and and you ask
4:14people what they want what they truly want and that will and a lot of times
4:20people are going after things that they don’t
4:26want you know a good point is and then look at what’s holding you back from habit because a truly empowered woman
4:33really does love herself and herself what she
4:40desires and but so the way I do it with my process though is I help people to
4:48become more aware and I an assessment that helps me to see what’s holding them
4:55back subconsciously what I found is that most people
5:00you know we all want to be loved we all want to be successful free we all want to be
5:05happy and you know I was earn that
5:10trying to prove myself and I work with a lot of women now that they’ll climb that
5:16ladder of success and find out they’re on the wrong wall they’re not fulfilled and it’s my process is really
5:23a very simple powerful process that just leads to Greater awareness and real self
5:30love and unless you can really genuinely love yourself when you do you unleash a
5:37power within yourself and but the way I do it is I
5:42first identify their self-defeating Loops habit patterns behaviors that are
5:49keeping them from loving themselves because like most people nowadays when you say selflove they think of taking
5:57care of themselves yeah yeah and it’s not just about that you are love you are
6:03loved and you are part of this universe that’s held together of love but I find
6:09that most people don’t just naturally automatically go there because they got
6:16these subconscious beliefs is like no I’ve been hurt before I’m not going
6:22there you know just like I came from a pretty traumatic childhood and what I
6:27saw mom and dad was hurting each other so on my mind Love Hurts So I’m keeping
6:32it out yeah receiving it but I can go and earn it I can go please everybody I
6:39can go prove myself I’m safe there the subconscious mind will do anything to
6:45keep you safe yeah yeah my process is is really simple it’s just you got to First
6:51identify that then you reprogram the brain you learn to genuinely love
6:57yourself I have several things that we can do but does that kind of give you a
7:03general idea I think one of the things that I found
7:09over the years with people is we’re not very good at knowing what we want we
7:14know what we don’t want um so you know I speak to that many clients who’ve set their goal in the negative you know I I
7:21don’t want to have the lack of sales I don’t want to um be going great I don’t want to be doing this and you’re like
7:28what do you want because the subconscious brain has no sense of humor does it well if you tell it it’s going
7:33to take you there like a SAT mouth so if we’re focused on what we don’t want we’re going to get more of it aren’t we
7:40right exactly same when you’re talking to people do you find one of the big problems is understanding first what it
7:46is they really do want rather than what it is they really don’t want well a lot of people think are the hard ones are a
7:54lot of people that think they know what they want because they’re defining
7:59themselves by this image outside this themselves who you
8:05are truly if you connect to who you are you know what you want yeah but too many
8:12people are defining themselves by their choices their mistakes they’re trying to be somebody that they’re not or they’re
8:20trying to be somebody that they think they should be or and so if you’re
8:26trying to be out here most people don’t know what they want because they’re not connected interally and when I say I
8:33look at a person on all four levels physically emotionally mentally and
8:38spiritually because if you’re not if you don’t know who you
8:44are so a lot of times I have to get I back up way back and I say okay first of
8:50all you have to choose yeah have the Power of Choice a lot of people don’t know that they can
8:57choose to know who they are and they’ve got to
9:02choose it they’ve got to look at who am I they got to know and I I have a a who
9:11am I paper that I do with people and I have them write out a three-page paper
9:16who am I physically emotionally mentally and spiritually and if you do that
9:22humbly you’ll know who you are then I say okay after you write it out wait 72
9:28hours write it again and who am I next the next time
9:34you do it it won’t be as long and then I have them do it one more time if you write out who you are physically
9:41emotionally mentally and spiritually that paper will be worth
9:46more than all the gold in the world yeah because when you know who you are you’ll
9:51know what you want yeah and and and and when you when you
9:57know who you are and what want you do want to choose to love
10:04yourself but that loving self is not just self-care it’s a recognition of who
10:11you are yeah we’re all love I love that because it’s it’s true
10:17I mean for for me personally when I went on my journey you know I didn’t like myself and now I do now I relish
10:23spending time with myself because actually I like me I like who I am and who I stand for and and that was a big
10:30shift for me like I had I had to go inward first and I had to go and face
10:35all those dark bits that I didn’t want to and and for me one of the big one of the hardest things to admit was all of
10:42these things that IID used as excuses to not move me forward well they might think this they might think that and
10:48they might think the other um was actually me those people didn’t think that at all never even asked them I’d never
10:55given them the the the actual respect to ask them what they thought I instead created what they thought and then used
11:02it as a reason to not move forward um and so for me you it
11:07was it was a it was quite a tough process to go through but joyous one
11:13when you go to the other side of it and when I can genuinely say no I like myself and I can appreciate myself and
11:19and the shift for me personally when I um first started I was asked to say
11:24three things that I appreciated about myself and it was the most excruciating half an hour of my life I couldn’t come
11:30up everything I tried I’ve got great friends that’s not about you I’ve got amazing family yeah that’s not about you
11:35and I literally I’m rocking going can’t think of anything and I eventually came after half an hour I came up with I’ve
11:41got quite nice eyes I mean I’m embarrassed to say that that’s how bad I
11:46was well you know a lot of people are that way I yeah yeah it I mean I hated
11:53myself until my 30s didn’t even know it no I was just out to prove self worthy
12:00trying to earn the love I got real good at it yeah okay but it leaves you empty
12:08and that’s where all these women are burned out now yeah because they’re not doing really what they want they’re not
12:16being who they are and they’re not really loving themselves self love is
12:23just a recognition of who you are but let me give you the side note what what once you experience that it’s pure joy
12:32yeah yeah and you’ll always come back to it yeah you always get and you get
12:37better and better and better at recognizing oh who am I and accepting
12:44yourself in all your imperfections and flaws and mistakes you’re not your
12:50choices you’re not your mistakes you you know you are who you
12:56are you are who you were born to be and here’s another I talked to a lady earlier who you know is trying to be
13:04this good person well it you can’t be somebody
13:10than than who you already are the transformation comes when you accept
13:18yourself it’s it’s so simple but
13:23so out there for some people because of our subconscious minds and until you get to those beliefs about who you believe
13:31on an unconscious level you are you’re going to try a hundred different
13:36programs yeah yeah yeah because the subconscious mind is going to do whatever it can to get you safe yeah and
13:45you’re not safe you’re not going there yeah you see I I definitely
13:52recognize that from and you know unfortunately for me I was well into my 40s before I started the journey so I
13:59was in my middle 30s before I even learned to love myself yeah I was a late starter mine was mine was late 40s but a
14:05large part of mine was when I realized that if I didn’t learn to love myself I was going to teach my little girl not to
14:10love herself because children don’t just learn by what we do and say they learn by how we are and how we show up and so
14:17for for me she was my Catalyst which was if I don’t want to leave the Legacy that she does this to herself I’ve got to fix
14:25doing it to myself and I’ve got to I’ve got to find a way of loving myself so that actually I can teach her to love
14:32herself and to distance I love what you’re saying about that you know you’re not your choices I always we don’t say I
14:37don’t say like that’s naughty or that’s good here and we’ll talk about whether or not it was a positive choice or a
14:43negative choice and so the reason it’s a choice is because the beauty of choice is the minute you make one that doesn’t
14:48serve you you can make a different one it’s like you don’t have to you don’t have to wear it for the rest of your life you know we’ve got so many sayings
14:55of old haven’t we that are just they’re just wrong like you know you’ve made your bed you’ve got a lie in it we haven’t it’s your bed get back out make
15:01it again it’s there’s always a new beginning always a new
15:06beginning I think a lot of times women try to get that New Beginning by trying to remake themselves
15:16reinvent and it’s not about changing who you are it’s about more about accepting
15:23who you are you know it’s yeah so yeah there’s
15:29Always A New Beginning there is and and we always get you know I’ve learned in life that
15:35everything in it is either a lesson a blessing or both so when I’m not feeling blessed um I look for the lesson and the
15:41blessing’s right there because it’s teaching you something like that is going to help you be who you’re here to
15:48be because I believe you we’re all we’ve all got a purpose and and once we
15:53acknowledge who we are and we and we accept who we are our purpose becomes really clear and then our ability to
15:59meet that purpose becomes so much easier because we’ve now got the you know that subconscious mind working for us instead
16:07of working it thinks for us but actually it’s often against us isn’t it right and
16:13well yeah and like I said the subconscious is just canceling out everything that’s not going to be safe
16:19well if you grew up in a place where you didn’t feel safe then you’re going to
16:27have some hard wirring that needs you need to create a new operating system yeah which is the internal it’s not
16:34external and so many people try to look out themsel outside themselves to change
16:40themselves no it’s inward because it all starts with you all answers are in you
16:46yeah I I absolutely get that so what would you say has been your proudest
16:53moment so far well of course it’s being a mother you know mother four children
16:59but in my work it’s so fulfilling because I can help PE I’ve helped a lot
17:06of people well start businesses be successful in their businesses I’ve
17:11helped people get pregnant that didn’t have the you know couldn’t get pregnant changed the mindset I’ve helped people
17:18I’ve helped women lose weight and that’s a big deal to a woman it’s I just help
17:25people get what they truly want yeah it’s possible anything is possible
17:33so I have like these 90day breakthrough challenges where there small groups of
17:39women so what I do is I give them an assessment they put on there what they want their goal and then in the 90 days
17:46we have a breakthrough challenge to achieve that goal
17:52and there’s very few people that ever don’t get what the challenge is yeah
17:59they break through they get their Challenge and that’s fulfilling there’s
18:05nothing more fulfilling than that but other than having children There’s No Greater Joy than being a mother right oh
18:12no there isn’t it’s a and for me they’re an your children are an everyday
18:17reminder of the fact that anything is possible you they they look at the world with such wonder and curiosity until we
18:25teach them to stop being curious because curiosity killed the cat and we put them in a little box we tell them that these
18:31are the rules and this is where you play and then we try and turn them all into little clones of each other because they
18:36all have to learn how to do exactly the same things and you’re like no you see their little personalities
18:43coming out in when they’re so tiny um and you kind of just look at that and go
18:49that’s the bit you’ve got to keep hold of isn’t that that that you should be whoever you’re here to be well you know
18:56when my children were born I had home birst I had or home burst and when they
19:01came out and I looked at them their personality when they came out is the
19:08same personality they have today yeah you can’t change it well no it’s where I
19:14mean I remember with with um Scarlet when I when I was pregnant we used to used to play this little game because I
19:20read somewhere that if you if you start communicating them with them when they’re in the room it helps them to be
19:25better communicators so we’d have this little game where I’d say something and I’d poke apart of of my stomach and then
19:31I wouldn’t say anything else until she kicked or punched where I’d been and then we’d go and do it somewhere else we
19:37did it every day which was fine until one day they were trying to actually get a heartbeat and I was like oh sorry she thinks she playing a game every time
19:44they were going she was moving somewhere else because she thought that was the game we were playing oh my goodness um
19:51but and we when but you kind of get it and go know that that mischievous cheeky little personality was there even then
19:59um because it comes I think our journey is always back to ourself isn’t it was
20:06Journey back to ourselves faster than others um but once we do Journey back to ourselves then we become who we are
20:13supposed to be without all of the um labels and the shackles and the the
20:20external challenges that’s when we really do build that life we dream of
20:25and everyone’s life dream is different to everybody else isn’t it it’s like kind so different yeah always want to
20:32look over our shoulder what you what our neighbors writing in case we get it wrong because it’s like well that’s their
20:38dream might not be mine I it doesn’t have to be the same I think learning to
20:43break away from saying actually I might want something different and that’s okay because we are all unique aren’t we yeah
20:50extremely all four of my children are completely different completely yeah and
20:56you can’t change it you can’t make them anyway well no because they they’re here
21:02to be who they’re here to be aren’t they so what would you say has been your greatest lesson s far um my greatest
21:10lesson of that you can’t control love you know I tried forever to control
21:17love and I remember one time with my mentor when I went through my divorce
21:23and I had all these emotions and I’d go to him and I’d say well he did this he
21:28did that and he um he’d say well so and
21:33so will be who he is just let it go off your back you don’t have to go into
21:39emotion over it right and then I thought oh I said Larry I got a great idea just
21:47take away the love and then I won’t go into the emotion anymore and he looked
21:53at me and he’s like Susan you cannot control love and I’ve since learned that
22:00you cannot control a good man either so a lot of times women get in there and
22:06they try to control a man and a good man will not have anything to do with it or
22:11vice versa but um you know you can’t earn love you can’t be perfect to be
22:19loved you can’t try to prove yourself worthy I would try to prove myself
22:24worthy of God’s love I’m going to do this this and this I’m G to be perfect
22:29and then I’ll get but really what I was seeking was validation yeah so I I was thinking that
22:37love I mean that love really was validation so I would do all of these
22:42things there’s plenty of counterfeits to love but love you can’t
22:48control is you cannot control pure true unconditional love and that’s when you
22:55have to learn to submit and surrender so yeah it’s you can’t control it you have
23:02to submit and when you’ve been hurt in the
23:07past you do not want to submit yeah and you know and a lot of
23:15it’s unconscious we don’t I don’t go around thinking oh I’m going to control love but I was busy trying to earn it I
23:22was trying to look good I was trying to be perfect I was trying to get all these achievements
23:28I would play sports as a little girl and I mean like four and five years
23:34old with boys five years older than me because my brother was five years older than me I would literally catch the
23:42ball on the other side of the field I I didn’t have any mind to stop
23:48me but I did it to get that validation that approval and I was super good in sports
23:57super good because I learned you know run Susie boom you get
24:03you get that love it’s funny how we create these um
24:09and then we become self-fulfilling prophecies don’t we what we tell ourselves is going to be what happens to us because we you know our our sub brain
24:17tries to help us to achieve what we’re telling it it’s just often we’re not telling it what we want we’re telling it
24:22the exact opposite of that and I I get that role you when you get external
24:27validation it doesn’t matter how much external validation you get it won’t mean anything until you can internally
24:34validate yourself as been one of the things I learn yeah and you know the thing about
24:40it is is I can guarantee you one thing when I guarantee my clients one thing
24:48100% sure that anything built upon control will eventually crumble yeah so
24:56these people go in and these women businesses or marriages 20 years after
25:01marriage and they’re like I don’t know what happened it was built upon control
25:08validation codependent whatever but anything built on control will
25:14eventually crumble I can guarantee you that so I’ve learned my lesson on the
25:20control and and learning to just let go to the love the hardest thing and I was
25:27having this conversation ation earlier with somebody is to learn to just
25:32receive love I’ll get really big and I still run into these behaviors now I’ve
25:38cleared the core issues out but I have to watch every once while and I’ll get busy sometimes because I can get stuff
25:45done I’m quick I played shortstop I I mean I could my sister trained me as a
25:50little girl okay she’d tell me 10 things to do and see how fast I could do them
25:56she was smart trying to get me to clean up for you know but sometimes I can get going and I can
26:03be really quick and get a lot done and then I feel good about myself I used to
26:09that was my validation that was my love that’s not love yeah I get so busy
26:15sometimes I still get busy and my son will say to me Mom are you letting the
26:21love in and I’m like like a child being caught in a
26:26candy store oh oh no thank you for reminding me and I’m finding that the
26:33vulnerability and the humility is much more powerful than that control yeah
26:39yeah and receiving that love we as women are receivers and in business you may
26:46think well that won’t go in business it takes you a hundred times farther when
26:52you receive yeah and it’s fun is it’s one of the things that we can find so difficult
26:58yeah I certainly was I was a very good giver and a very bad receiver um and and
27:05I didn’t realize the impact I had on other people as a result of that as well because they would give you the like
27:11great feedback or they’d give you like the gift of something and it was as if you didn’t want it and that wasn’t true
27:16it wasn’t because you didn’t want it it’s because you didn’t feel you deserved it um but seeing the change in
27:22my relationships now that you now that actually I can receive it and and do and
27:27great ful every time I do um has been has been amazing and I think it’s um you
27:33know for I I think it is it’s moving that part round and you one of the things I learned about leadership is the
27:39first thing you’ve got to get got to do is get comfortable with the uncomfortable you’re never going to be in control you’re never going to be in
27:45control because people are messy and they won’t follow the rules all of the time and things will they’re imperfect
27:51they’re human because that’s what we’re supposed to be so unless you can get comfortable with the uncomfortable which is there will be an unknown something
27:58will get taken out of your hands you will get to you know you’ll have to roll with the punches sometimes and then
28:04actually life becomes so much easier when when you do that I remember doing a big redundancy program and saying to the
28:10board the day before and they were like Kim are we ready and I was like ready as will’ll ever be and they did look a bit horrified they were like what do you
28:16mean should be cancell I said well know what I mean is we’re going to tell 1800 people their jobs are at risk tomorrow I
28:22have no idea what that piece of information when added to the burden they’re already carrying is going to do
28:28nor could I ever know so all I can do is be there for them hold the space while
28:34they process however that works for them um I said because that’s what we’ve got
28:39to do we can’t control it what we can do is be there be who you are be present
28:46yeah be present be intentional I love that’s what you’ve talked about a lot you know throughout throughout the podcast is making an intentional
28:53decision about what we’re about what we’re choosing um and therefore you’ve got to be much more present to it
29:00haven’t it you’ve got to be much more aware of not just you I was thinking everything there’s a cost of doing
29:06something but there’s a cost of not doing it and actually looking at both sides of that equation before we move um
29:11even if we do that at speed and you I think we’re very similar I do a lot of things at speed I my team used to hate
29:17Fridays because I worked from home on a Friday and they’d be like by lunch time you’ve bombed us with all the work that we’ve put on your desk all week because
29:24you’ve been busy and then you’ve turned it around and put it all back on outs by time and I was like I that’s been
29:30helpful they like no we hate Friday we like send her out somewhere so she can’t do as much work um but again that was
29:38back to how I deemed my value before yes
29:43and and now now that you’ve changed that you kind of go back look and go imagine if I could go back and and change that
29:49so on that on that note if you could go back and give yourself your younger self a piece of advice what would it
29:55be um stop trying trying so hard you know it’s you know and like I said it
30:02would be to let the love in just it’s it’s it’s not I don’t have to try so
30:09hard I and you know which trying so hard is the
30:14overthinking you know and um and it really is in just letting the love end
30:20because it’s a different world it’s a you know when you grown up trying to control everything because you
30:28want to be safe and um to let the love in it’s it’s
30:36a different world so but it’s a beautiful I mean the love is all around
30:41us yeah and it sounds you know some people would say cheesy or
30:49whatever but love is where miracles happen and when have that love and open
30:54your heart it has a way of working things out that we could never do life has got your
31:01back yeah and and it’s really not that complicated it’s us that’s making it
31:09complicated so I would tell my young I used to as a I remember as a teenager
31:15thinking I was ugly and I’d have gobs of guys around me
31:21as friends because I thought I was ugly I wasn’t letting the love it you know what I’m saying yeah and and it it holds
31:29us back and we don’t let the love in because we don’t realize that we are
31:35love yeah that we think you know I used to think oh well I’m bad this or that
31:41and so until you get to those core beliefs you can do all this self-help
31:47work I I hate to say it the self-help work to out the guru but you get to
31:54those core subconscious beliefs and really see that the ones we all have
32:01them I don’t care I’ve talked um there’s people that come from very good
32:07homes and still their subtle underlying
32:13generational things that come through and they have a hard time seeing Oh I
32:18had a good childhood well we still have these b and a lot beliefs about ourselves and a lot of people do not see
32:27that these underlying beliefs and they do all of this stuff they work their
32:32guts out and all to find
32:38out you know they climb that ladder of success and they’re on the wrong wall and not fulfilled I work with a lot
32:46of people that aren’t fulfilled they they’re I’ve worked with people that are
32:51incredibly talented and they can do just about
32:56anything but that that deep down inside you know they’re missing and um so I would tell my just
33:06let the love in yeah but I would tell my younger self you are loved I’m part of this love
33:13that’s the UN that holds the universe together and and lately I have been
33:20coming out more and now you may say how does that work in business well in
33:25business when you can get a personal aligned with who they are they know who they are they will know what they want
33:34they’re humble when you truly love yourself you’re humble yeah you see miracles happen
33:43things happen from week to week when people are aligned with who they are
33:49some people you know or show up for themselves same thing is Love Yourself show up for yourself you know
33:57and be align be your authentic self you know I have the authentic blueprint
34:02assessment because people want they crave that because you really touch and
34:10are being your authentic self just loving yourself the joy that comes and the things that happen you can’t
34:18expain and that’s why children are so so wonderful because they they just go in
34:25that flow yeah no I I I I still get Susan I could
34:30literally chat to you all day but I’m conscious that we are running out of time um so how how best can people get
34:39into it obviously we’ll have all of your details in the show notes below but what’s the best way people can reach out
34:45to learn more and see how they can work with you well you can go to my LinkedIn
34:51um go to my LinkedIn you can message me um you know you can uh take my authentic
34:57blueprint assessment and then when you get through taking it at the end of it it’ll take you to my calendar and we can
35:04schedule time to go over the results get to know each other or some people will
35:09just do a discovery call you don’t have to do the assessment and we can get to know each other I can help answer your
35:16questions or just chat because I like to learn about other people too oh Susan I
35:23love that we will have all of those details just in the notes below so that people can reach out and connect with
35:29you but my gratitude for coming and spending this time with us and sharing your love and your Insight so thank you
35:37oh thank you bless you until next time take care
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